Do you want to know how to get him back? How about how to KEEP him? That’s really the question you should be asking. You see, there are two types of breakups. There are the kind that happen when you are separated from your partner in a physical sense, and those that happen when you are no physically separated, but there is a serious problem with your relationship.
When you do find that there are serious, serious problems in your relationship, it is much better to simply break up than to try to figure out how to get him back. However, if you feel that things are not broken beyond repair, then it may be worth trying to salvage the relationship. But really, step #1 is determining whether or not you feel that the relationship is salvageable. If it is, then you should do everything in your power to attempt to make things work.
However, there are many points where you will feel like giving up hope, because for whatever reason, the tactics that you are trying while learning how to get him back are not working. In this case, you may need to think outside the box– or just go back to the basics.
Depending on how strong the relationship was in the first place, your attitude toward the whole ordeal may vary a lot. If this is the end of what you considered to be a strong marriage, for example, you could end up feeling absolutely devastated, and you’ll really want to find out how to get him back.
I’ve come up with a few different ways of figuring out how to get your ex boyfriend to want you back for good. Keep these in mind the next time you talk to your ex, and bear in mind that though none of this is fool-proof, they are very solid, proven tactics.
Tip #1: Encourage your guy to express his feelings in an honest and open way.
Here’s how to get him back. Recognize that he may have a lot of frustrations, and allow him to vent. After he’s completed this and gotten everything out in the open, he’ll probably feel a lot better. This in turn may lead to him cooling down, though this is dependent to how you react to him. So keep a cool head yourself. And once everything’s out in the open, he’ll be more likely to want to have a real conversation.
Remember that making a marriage or a relationship work is going to take effort on the part of both parties. You both need to commit yourself to making things work, and one of the essential parts of this is being able to communicate with each other properly. If you’re still at a point where you’re sniping at each other and not making a solid effort to understand why the you both feel the way you do, then you’re not going to have much success in learning how to get him back.
Tip #2: Recognize that every person is different
Remember this when figuring out how to get him back: When you first met your ex, you probably found that the two of you had a lot in common. Or maybe that’s not how it worked out. Opposites can certainly attract as well. Yet it is the things that you had in common that held you together. When beginning a relationship, it is easy to overlook your differences and only see the things that you have in common, but once these differences come to light and the relationship escalates, things can go south.
For example, maybe one day, one partner will do something or other that will slightly annoy the other. Or maybe more than slightly. So how to handle this? Well, you might get a bit freaked out, and then you might start seeing a lot of other little things that annoy you. It’s important to discuss these things and resolve them quickly, because if not, they’ll just keep building up, and eventually they can destroy the relationship. Remember this for the future, but for the time being, you need to get these things out in the open with your ex if you want to learn how to get him back.
Tip #3: When working through your problems, don’t be a jerk
As I stated before, when you first get into a relationship, things might be coming up roses. Then, you realize that the two of you have differences, and those differences need to be worked out. Once you’ve got these things out in the open, try to refrain from making fun of his hang-ups, and don’t make degrading remarks toward him. Remember, you are trying to reconcile things, not add to his ammunition supply in the case that the two of you have a blowup again. If you don’t treat the things he cares about with respect, he’ll absolutely know it, and you won’t have solved anything.
So there you have it. Three methods of how to get him back for good. Remember that there’s no “easy” way to do this if you want to build a lasting relationship. For further advice, check out our reviews of guides on how to get him back.